For most American families, there’ s one major money-related tradition associated with Thanksgiving: Black Friday shopping. But for others, bargain hunting takes a back seat to a financial reality check. They use this time together as an opportunity to discuss and review a host of financial issues ranging from estate planning and wills to investment and philanthropy.

And financial advisers, who sometimes attend more formal versions of these Thanksgiving conversations, have much to share in terms of what direction these meetings can take. They stress that with a little preparation, and a lot of non-confrontational goodwill, families can come out with an increased sense of connectedness, cooperation and shared vision.

Still, it’ s hard to gauge how family members will react, even to the most innocuous statements. Every tribe has its more emotional and melodramatic types, and so it’ s crucial to limit the chances of misinterpretation or outbursts. This may be especially true if younger adults are involved and feel cornered in front of the whole family, experts say.

Listening is the most important part, says Ben Tobias, president of Tobias Financial Advisors in Plantation, Florida. If a son or daughter wants to join the Peace Corps instead of get a more traditional job, find out the reasons why, and remember that doing something for two or three years can be a valuable experience. But ask, Have you given any thought to your plans after that? You want them to look a little more in the future than just immediate gratification.