| "When one of the doctors criticizes me,
I get defensive. I feel like a child again, being scolded, and I want to explain
that I'm not wrong," says Viola, a nurse. This is a common reaction to
criticism, but not a good one. There are better ways of dealing with
criticism. {{B}}1. Try to be objective.{{/B}} When Sol was criticized by his new employer for not having made a sale, Sol’s reaction was to feel sorry for himself. "I had put everything I had into making that sale," Sol says," and I felt that I had failed as a person. I had to learn through experience not to react like that to each failure." {{B}}2. Take time to cool down.{{/B}} Rather than reacting immediately to criticism, take some time to think over what was said. Your first question should be whether the criticism is fair from the other person's position. The problem may be a simple misunderstanding of what you did or your reasons for doing it. {{B}}3. Take positive action.{{/B}} After you cool down, consider what you can do about the situation. The best answer may be "nothing". "I finally realized that my boss was having personal problems and taking them out on me because I was there," says Sheila. "His criticisms didn't really have anything to do with my work, so nothing I said or did was going to change them." In Sheila's ease, the best way to deal with it was to leave her job. 'However, that's an extreme reaction. You may simply explain your opinion without expecting an in-depth discussion. You may even decide that the baffle isn't worth fighting this time. The key, in any case, is to have a reasonable plan. |