问答题
What is your comment on the following paragraph? Rewrite it and explain why you want to rewrite it that way.One winter morning when Father left the Riding Club on horseback, Father"s horse fell with Father. Not only did the stupid animal fall but the animal landed on Father"s foot. Father pulled Father"s foot out from under, got the horse up, and went on to the Park for Father"s ride. But Father found later that one of Father"s toes had been bent and that Father couldn"t straighten the toe out.
【正确答案】正确答案：One winter morning when Father left the Riding Club on horseback, his horse fell with him. Not only did the stupid animal fall but it landed on Father"s foot. Father pulled his foot out from under, got the horse up, and went on to the Park for his ride. But he found later that one of his toes had been bent and that he couldn"t straighten it out.(6 points) The original version is rather redundant without proper use of pronouns. Proper use of pronouns is able to make the paragraph smooth, brief and clear.(2 points)Therefore, I use proper pronouns in my rewriting. For example, in the first sentence, I use "his horse" to replace "Father"s horse" in order to make it brief without any ambiguity.(2 points)