(46) Speaking of the loving warmth of the extended family, the popular image is of granny by the TV, baby playing in the crib and the rest cheerfully interacting between the two generational poles. Tradition and education are effortlessly passed on in a clearly marked comfort zone. Perfect for security, not to mention free babysitting. But wait. Study the mother"s face: exhausted, tense, unhappy. She is the pivot upon whom this cozy world turns. (47) She is the "supercarer" who spoonfeeds baby and granny both, makes sure they are entertained and out of danger, looks after the rest of the household and, chances are, holds down a paying job. Stuck between demanding or weak grandparents and always demanding and vulnerable little ones, this woman is not so much sandwiched as crushed between generations. It is not surprising, then, that a report last week claimed that 65 percent of supercarers were dissatisfied with their lives. I had a taste of their existence when, at the beginning of the year, my 73-year-old father came to stay. (48) He was so ill that he couldn"t walk or even roll over in his bed and was a sad, helpless presence, as in need of my attention as my kids. She, meanwhile, didn"t enjoy sharing her space and my time with someone who complained loudly about the noise she made. Running between them, conscious that all this "caring" was taking its toll, I remember thinking this was hell as many people (80 percent of them women) daily lived it. If you are well off like Cherie Booth, say, the fact that you are a supercarer (Booth, a QC with three children in their teens and twenties, also looks after her mother and her young son, Leo) presents a challenge but is at least achievable. What of the others, though, the ones who earn ￡8 an hour cleaning someone else"s home or sweeping a hospital ward? They find no let-up at home, but cramped living space invaded by crying babies and coughing old folk. (49) For them, being a supercarer means being a superloser, with far less of what everyone considers important: money, privacy, quality time for your partner and children. Demographic trends mean that more of us are destined to be supercarers; there are now about 2.5 million and this is expected to rise to 3.9 million by 2020, That"s a lobby with considerable bar gaining potential. So far, supercarers have not flexed their muscles. (50) The government would be wise to offer them tax breaks, the allowance available to those assisting the disabled and flexible work schedules. Otherwise, supercarers will rebel. Once they decide that the very old, as the very young, are not their responsibility, who will then take up the burden?